Giantsportal.com | San Francisco Giants News, giants Scores, Game Recaps & Commentary - <div>Legendary Celtics coach Red Auerbach used to signal a game was over when he lit up his cigar in Boston Garden. </div>In Giants Stadium, the fans get up and leave. When they started streaming for the exits Sunday with just under five minutes to go, with their team trailing the Eagles by only nine points, the New York faithless confirmed what we have known all along: The Philadelphia Eagles have fans. The New York Giants have spectators. So what do New Yorkers do when they have lots of free time on their hands, time formerly spent following their Mets, Yankees and Giants in the playoffs? If you're columnist Filip Bondy of the New York Daily News, you start swinging hatchets at Philadelphia. On Wednesday, Bondy wrote: "No matter where a New York fan turns these days, a vulgar scent of cheesesteak taints the atmosphere and distorts the schedule of sports events on our flat-screen televisions. Philadelphia is the new Boston, suddenly. Maybe not as prim and haughty, but every bit as dangerous and much, much sneakier." The column bears the headline: "Forget Boston, we have new city to hate." " 'Trashy people from either Philadelphia or the Southern region of New Jersey' is how Urbandictionary.com defines Eagles fans," Bondy adds. Can you feel the love here? You can return the love by reaching out to him at fjbondy@netscape.net. The suspension of the Phillies' J.C. Romero for testing positive for a banned substance is fishier than a chain of sushi bars. One thing I do know: Romero, like 749 other guys on major-league clubs, does not have a degree in pharmacology to figure out what is in every single thing he consumes, especially when it's not listed on the label . If he in fact took something he shouldn't have, given those circumstances, 50 games is grossly excessive for merely being judged "negligent." Baseball is trying to give the appearance it's actually doing something about drug abuse. Targeting Romero and suspending him for 50 games is like jailing someone for jaywalking when there are carjackings going on in plain sight. Those of you with delicate sensibilities might want to skip over the next item. On the other hand, those of you with weak bladders who love the game of golf, please, read on: It's called the UroClub. I am not making this up. It's built like a 7-iron, only with a really thick, hollow handle, which is a reservoir for use when, um, nature calls and the nearest stand of trees is somewhere over in another zip code. It comes with a "triple-seal cap" and a privacy towel. The reservoir holds half a liter, which is fine for taking care of that pre-tee-off soda, but what about the duffer who quaffed a half-dozen beers before setting out? And heaven help the poor fellow who mistakenly grabs this club out of the bag to make a shot when the guy who last had it forgot to secure the triple-seal cap. Whoa, watch out on that backswing. . . . Suffice it to say, he won't be too popular in the clubhouse. The UroClub has a cute tagline, though: "The only club in your bag guaranteed to keep you out of the woods!" You can check it out online at www.uroclub.org. Quick hits and headlines Man found aboard idling Zamboni faces OUI charge Police found a man from Portland, Maine, trying to operate an idling Zamboni, which had crashed into a wall, inside the Cumberland County Civic Center, which is home to the Portland Pirates hockey team. Police said the man appeared to be intoxicated. "How do I get out of thish parking lot, offisher?" Player sets unwanted record with three-second dismissal A player with English minor-league club Chippenham Town has set a record for the fastest red card in senior soccer when he was sent off for a wild tackle three seconds after kickoff in a recent game. Imagine if he had been holding a grudge. N.Y.C. man wins his second couch-potato title Stan Friedman, 47, a Manhattan research librarian, logged 18 hours, 48 minutes and 17 seconds of sports-watching time to successfully defend his title in the second annual ESPN Zone Ultimate Couch Potato Competition. His winning time in last year's inaugural competition was 29 hours. The participants, sitting in recliners in front of dozens of televisions, weren't allowed to go to sleep or leave their recliners except for restroom breaks once every eight hours. I wonder whether they are allowed to mute the commercials. (And can you bring a UroClub?) And how do you prepare for a marathon like this? Do you get OUT of shape? They even have a training camp for this competition: It's called the NCAA Basketball Tournament. Cowboys release troubled cornerback "Pacman" Jones Remember how naughty he was when he had a team watching over him night and day? The good seats are going fast for this guy's expected off-season antics. This article contains information from Inquirer wire services. Contact staff writer Al Campbell at 215-854-5414 or acampbell@phillynews.com.

Legendary Celtics coach Red Auerbach used to signal a game was over when he lit up his cigar in Boston Garden.

In Giants Stadium, the fans get up and leave. When they started streaming for the exits Sunday with just under five minutes to go, with their team trailing the Eagles by only nine points, the New York faithless confirmed what we have known all along: The Philadelphia Eagles have fans. The New York Giants have spectators.

So what do New Yorkers do when they have lots of free time on their hands, time formerly spent following their Mets, Yankees and Giants in the playoffs?

If you're columnist Filip Bondy of the New York Daily News, you start swinging hatchets at Philadelphia.

On Wednesday, Bondy wrote:

"No matter where a New York fan turns these days, a vulgar scent of cheesesteak taints the atmosphere and distorts the schedule of sports events on our flat-screen televisions. Philadelphia is the new Boston, suddenly. Maybe not as prim and haughty, but every bit as dangerous and much, much sneakier."

The column bears the headline: "Forget Boston, we have new city to hate."

" 'Trashy people from either Philadelphia or the Southern region of New Jersey' is how Urbandictionary.com defines Eagles fans," Bondy adds.

Can you feel the love here?

You can return the love by reaching out to him at fjbondy@netscape.net.

The suspension of the Phillies' J.C. Romero for testing positive for a banned substance is fishier than a chain of sushi bars.

One thing I do know: Romero, like 749 other guys on major-league clubs, does not have a degree in pharmacology to figure out what is in every single thing he consumes, especially when it's not listed on the label .

If he in fact took something he shouldn't have, given those circumstances, 50 games is grossly excessive for merely being judged "negligent."

Baseball is trying to give the appearance it's actually doing something about drug abuse. Targeting Romero and suspending him for 50 games is like jailing someone for jaywalking when there are carjackings going on in plain sight.

Those of you with delicate sensibilities might want to skip over the next item. On the other hand, those of you with weak bladders who love the game of golf, please, read on:

It's called the UroClub. I am not making this up. It's built like a 7-iron, only with a really thick, hollow handle, which is a reservoir for use when, um, nature calls and the nearest stand of trees is somewhere over in another zip code.

It comes with a "triple-seal cap" and a privacy towel. The reservoir holds half a liter, which is fine for taking care of that pre-tee-off soda, but what about the duffer who quaffed a half-dozen beers before setting out?

And heaven help the poor fellow who mistakenly grabs this club out of the bag to make a shot when the guy who last had it forgot to secure the triple-seal cap. Whoa, watch out on that backswing. . . .

Suffice it to say, he won't be too popular in the clubhouse.

The UroClub has a cute tagline, though: "The only club in your bag guaranteed to keep you out of the woods!"

You can check it out online at www.uroclub.org.

Quick hits and headlines Man found aboard idling Zamboni faces OUI charge

Police found a man from Portland, Maine, trying to operate an idling Zamboni, which had crashed into a wall, inside the Cumberland County Civic Center, which is home to the Portland Pirates hockey team.

Police said the man appeared to be intoxicated.

"How do I get out of thish parking lot, offisher?" Player sets unwanted record with three-second dismissal A player with English minor-league club Chippenham Town has set a record for the fastest red card in senior soccer when he was sent off for a wild tackle three seconds after kickoff in a recent game.

Imagine if he had been holding a grudge. N.Y.C. man wins his second couch-potato title Stan Friedman, 47, a Manhattan research librarian, logged 18 hours, 48 minutes and 17 seconds of sports-watching time to successfully defend his title in the second annual ESPN Zone Ultimate Couch Potato Competition. His winning time in last year's inaugural competition was 29 hours.

The participants, sitting in recliners in front of dozens of televisions, weren't allowed to go to sleep or leave their recliners except for restroom breaks once every eight hours.

I wonder whether they are allowed to mute the commercials. (And can you bring a UroClub?) And how do you prepare for a marathon like this? Do you get OUT of shape? They even have a training camp for this competition: It's called the NCAA Basketball Tournament. Cowboys release troubled cornerback "Pacman" Jones Remember how naughty he was when he had a team watching over him night and day? The good seats are going fast for this guy's expected off-season antics. This article contains information from Inquirer wire services.

Contact staff writer Al Campbell

at 215-854-5414

or acampbell@phillynews.com.